Limited Connectivity

You have the choice of writing or pics, but the free range organic Oregon coast wifi can't handle both. I had so many wonderful things to relate, but I just can't right now. For example I found a perfect spot for Mr B to perform his Brando Apocalypse Now impersonation. He does a mean Brando. Oh and I found six places to shoot At Home with the Gnomes today. This place just works for me.

Walk through the opening and you're standing in the roots of a huge tree. One of the cooler discoveries of the trip.

Shark! Shark! Nope a one-eyed sea lion hunting lunch.

Astoria's commercial fishing port and sailor loving groupies.

It looks crooked in real life too. I used the Crouchman Technique to hand hold a long exposure even though my tripod was fifty yards away.

Look Ma! No Thoughts!

Hi. Not a single thought and I can't think of a highlight to share.  The good news is I'm going to try again later or maybe tomorrow. I'll make something up if I have to.

Here's my brain fart of the day: I'm trying to communicate with the Spanish speaking maid, but lacking Spanish I go with the next logical choice--Lithuanian.

Last week I picked up garbage for the Seaside Chamber of Commerce. I'm not sure why, but the head of the Chamber felt compelled to point out to me "we don't usually get temps with your intellect."

I wandered off the highway looking for an old fashioned barber shop and ended up in the town where they filmed "Twilight." "Halloweentown" and a Foo Fighters video have also been filmed there. I got coiffed in the salon that was used as Petite Jolie in "Twilight."

Start notes here: MG haha you're a girl, but at least you don't have to read about it. Twilight. Mt Hood. Mt St Helens. Temp intellect. Standing up to corporate. Life path of mines. Garbage collecting. Haircut. The three scary words more or less. Clams like chicken. Gore stories of the Chamber of Commerce.

Hedonophobia

This is me with my thinking cap on.

Sometimes I think so hard my hair changes color.

You all asked to see the face behind the blog and, although I'd prefer to let The Minions be the official face of Jotsalot Media LLC, I'm obliging.  No feeling of sacrificing my privacy here, I gave that up years ago when I posed for Playgirl's Former Child Stars of the Big Ten issue. What can I say it was 1983 and I had abs and a visible jawline. Search for it online or rummage through my storage shed for the last remaining copy. My well-intentioned parents bought the others thinking it would kill my comeback which it couldn't because I had five bit parts in 1972 and I'm much more comfortable being naked in front of camera but I can't do porn because well, read my most recent personal ad

SWM seeks F. I'm height and weight proportionate if I were a penguin with a thyroid problem. I have a few phobias that won't affect our relationship unless you try to touch me. I'm really lots of fun except for the touching thing. Call me.

 What else is new? I'm really tired of living the life of a high-end transient. Here's a new word for you gaberlunzie. Now matter how you say it or spin it, I'm tired of wandering in circles. I need a place to work in peace and finally unpack after twelve years in storage.

I love the coast. I was born to live seaside.

Astoria

I now have two P.O. boxes which, I think, triggers an investigation. Would you like the address in Missoula or Astoria? Neither?

If you really want to see Astoria all dressed up watch Kindergarten Cop. It's a beautiful place with a real downtown filled with small businesses and seagulls.

I'm really tired and going to bed. Maybe tomorrow I'll post pictures of our trips to Mt St Helens. You must visit it if you haven't already.

Boat entering downtown Astoria's harbor.

Mr B at Mt St Helens.  Tricky lighting.

Christening by Seagull

Mr B with Mt Rainier trying to upstage him.

Greetings from the Lamplighter's 127. A one night only roof on Jotsalot's Final Re-Nest Tour. I've declared this my home and I'm never moving again. Sure the streets are labeled in Finnish and seagulls battle sea lions for being the loudest. but the place really appeals to the Pisces in me.

I left Missoula thirty-six hours later than planned (not counting the four years on the original schedule). I blame optimism. I sincerely believed everything was under control, ahead of schedule, firing on all cylinders until I started packing props and photography stuff. My living room held: seven glass heads, three mannequin torsos, a 50s beauty salon hairdryer (you know the chair with the beehive thing), dozens of small props, and an enlarger. None of which wanted packing. I knew all those glass heads were going to bite me in the ass some day. Everyone always commented on them, and they work great for hats, but maybe I didn't need to have seven of them around the room. Okay, secretly I want more when I have the space. But the real challenge was getting The Minions organized and packed or specifically A Minion.

Ms Marigold seemed content, even relieved, to stay in Montana, but Mr B wasn't having anything to do with that. He's fun to travel with, the only problem is he's not allowed near campgrounds as part of his probation.*

*Mr B here. I am not on probation I'm in what's called a vocational redirection program. I swear I was just cutting through a busload of tourists, on my way to a berry patch, when I noticed a mosquito on a man's head and thoughtfully swatted it for him. Complete misunderstanding. And for bears reading this, next time someone plays dead try tickling them. They'll still scream and wet their pants, but it's not admissible in court.

Me again. So, I brought him.

Let's get to the highlights, we're hungry

-Ritzville WA is the creepiest, scariest, get me out hereiest place I've ever been

-B, in a clear “vocational redirection” violation, posed with tourists at Mt Rainier

-I drove passed a combination beauty parlor/taxidermist shop which now seems a perfect idea

-I took the last room in Moses Lake right in front of a honeymoon couple

Visa Gera Montana

Ahh, the final post from the Jotsalot Media LLC World Headquarters and I truly have nothing to say. Nothing. Maybe it's because I'm surrounded by unfilled boxes and lists of things to do in the next three days. Maybe it's because I'll be walking the streets of a new town and watching local news in a strange town. I love watching local news on the road. I really do.

I'll miss Miracle of America, Gem Mountain and P-burg and The Bird. Some people too, but I refuse to start a list.

See you next week from a hotel room in Astoria.

Karmageddon

I knew in my heart I hadn't created a new word, but I didn't think it would actually be in the dictionary. Be assured this post will have nothing to do with the title and, in fact, I would change it if I weren't so darned curious about how many extra hits I'll get.

Hello Malaysia, how are you? Thank you for dropping by every week.

All of you have heard, read or discovered (lucky you) that "thoughts become things," right? I'll share with you why I truly believe. I sought the help of a shrink to sort out some issues. Who hadn't guessed I needed professional help? Anyone? Now, I happened upon the only shrink in Montana, or probably anywhere else in the World, that began his career as an accountant, earned his MBA and then went back to school to become a psychologist. I like diversity and divergency so I took his experience as an asset. Ever on the lookout for new ways to avoid discussing feelings, I asked him how he went from business to psychology.

He worked at an ag products conglomerate and one of his duties was teaching free business classes to farmers and ranchers. Being at heart a business man he was always trying to decode why one farm prospered and another barely survived. He'd looked for the answer for several years until one day he saw two farms right across the road from each other and one looked very prosperous and the other was just kind of there.  Both farms had the same topography, acreage, soil, sun, rain, crops, prices for crops whatever they were identical in every way except prosperity. His curiosity compelled him to stop and fate had it the prosperous farmer had been attending the free classes. They got to talking and the farmer glowed when he talked about his farm and how it was putting his kids through college, and they were planning to come home and take it over and some day his grandchildren would own it etc. Shrink met the farmer across the road and Farmer B said just the opposite. His kids wanted nothing to do with farming, nobody ever got rich farming, it is what it is etc.

My former psychologist works almost entirely with corporate clients (only taking "unique and challenging" private patients for fun) and, to get to the end, the consistent difference between prosperity and failure, in every business, is attitude and vision.

This post's Trivia Challenge: How many times did I change tenses mid-stream?

Here's a token graphic.