No Time Like Overtime

Always beware of the fact, that the only thing hindering an all out revolution is your fear of losing the scraps they throw at you. -GORE VIDAL

And that is why I wake up and go to work, instead of creating, and hate every minute of it.

Death to Fear

I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet strange, I am ungrateful to these teachers. -KAHLIL GIBRAN, Sand and Foam


I'm in a steep learning curve fueled by anger and curbed by fear. I should be thankful for the horrors trying to turn my self-limiting fears into the desirable choice, but I still hold the horrors. Hate them, rage at them, and embrace them because I know what they are. I'm not sure what could be worse than where I am and what I'm doing (other than life in a Third World prison) and I don't want to find out. Could it be as simple as failure? Been there and done that multiple times, surviving when I thought it was impossible. I've done the impossible as many times as failed with equal ease. (It is failure-mostly-and I just wrote myself out of it, but I need more post.) Fear of success? Isn't that like being afraid of an all-u-can eat buffet? It makes zero sense and it's not me. Fear of the new and unknown? Possibly, happiness has always been an elusive state for me and my plans will make me very happy. So why is it I let the horrors stay?

I don't know, but I sure use “but” a lot.

Let me give you some good news: The shattered tooth was removed and I now have a convenient place to store a six inch sub. It didn't just give in and let itself be yanked; it was kicking and clinging to life until the dentist grabbed the Sawzall. RIP Molar 15

More good news: I've decided to go be happy no matter the cost.